HAPPINESS: 3 amazing tips from the world's oldest case study

We’ve all heard countless studies, articles and TV interviews on happiness. But the other day I stumbled upon something that is just now being revealed to the media for the first time.* It's a 72 year old study that began all the way back in 1937 when 268 Harvard University sophomores were asked to participate in a study measuring “a formula-some mix of love, work, and adaptation-for a good life.” And while many of those who were college sophomores in 1937 are now dying or in their fading twilight, this study continues to be diligently maintained to this very day.And never before has science been able to report such fascinating and thoroughly time-tested results on happiness. Following are 3 powerful lessons from this study.
1. Have a Healthy Outlet So many of the people in this study seemed to have all their ducks in a row. In their prime years in the 1950’s and 1960’s, they were making big money in powerful careers. They had beautiful families and lived in idyllic neighborhoods. Oddly enough, later in life, many of these fortunate people ended up breaking down mentally and physically. Why? If one didn’t have a healthy outlet for their fears, nerves, and struggles, it was only a matter of time before repressed demons erupted to the surface. The happiest people in this study had a healthy outlet. They were altruistic or had a rich sense of humor. They funneled their issues into sport, “their lust into courtship.”It’s something important to consider. As the study proves, a human being can get away with sustaining daily nerves, fears, and doubts for a number of years. But ultimately, such a nervous nelly will crack. If you haven’t already, develop an outlet…find a sport, commit to helping others, lighten up, and laugh more often. A wise one said, "A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs, jolted by every pebble in the road." 2. Don’t Take Yourself Too Seriously This study, as reported in Atlantic Magazine, was summed up beautifully by the journalist Joshua Shenk: “Herein lies the key to a good life--not rules to follow, nor problems to avoid-- but an engaged humility, an earnest acceptance of life’s pains and promises.”In other words, one can only carry the burden of a big ego and lots of pride for so long before your proverbial knees will buckle. Don’t take life too seriously. We all have weaknesses. Do you really want to battle your dark side year after year? Or might it just be time to lay down your arms, take a deep breath, and enjoy life. It’s shorter than you think. 3. Happiness Must be Shared The other night I was watching the movie adaptation of Into the Wild, the true story of Chris McCandless. Fed up with the rat race, McCandless graduated college in the early 1990's, left his worried parents in the dust, sold all his belongings, and ventured deep into the Alaskan wilderness. Before dying of starvation, he seemed to regret his isolationist ways and wrote these last words in his journal, “Happiness only real when shared.” According to the 72 year old study, McCandless was spot on. In the study, those who spent too much alone time ultimately struggled. The happiest subjects in the study were those who sustained meaningful, healthy relationships with friends and family. One can never give enough hugs, say enough "I love you's," and send enough "I miss you's." As I emphasize in my book and to my own crazy self each and every day: Livin' the good life is not fancy trips, and expensive jewels, and high brow country clubs. Rather, livin' the good life is livin' the moment!*This study was reported in the media for the first time by ATLANTIC MAGAZINE, June 2009

by Yeah Dave (David Romanelli), on Tue Jun 23, 2009 4:29pm PDT

I thought this article expressed so beautifully what "happiness" really is. I also think that it is important to keep these thoughts in our minds as we try to balance all the things going on in our world today.

Be happy!!

A New Camera

We continue to wait out this horrible housing market. We continue to have the same ups and downs as all who are trying to sell in this market. The most important thing for us is to keep our eyes on the goal. It is so easy to become discouraged so we continue to busy ourselves with living in the present and planning for the future. This leads me to Mike’s new camera and lens along with our new found love of birding.


I have a Sony digital camera which serves me well but in order to upgrade our pictures and get those beautiful bird shots Mike wanted to get a DSLR. He researched and read many reviews and considering our budget decided on a Nikon 60. He was able to get a bundle which included the camera body, and two lens. He came home with a 18-55 mm lens and a 55-200 mm lens. He was like a kid with a new toy and even took a class offered in Atlanta on the use of his new Nikon 60. Even though the quality of the pictures and the distance was so much improved over my Sony he still wanted to be able to get closer shots. It was while reading Fred and Jo Wishnies' journal and admiring Fred’s wonderful pictures that he decided that he needed to get yet another lens. This one is a 150-500 mm. Now that is a huge lens. Of course this lens has to be set up on a
tripod but it is certainly worth the effort.

Something to enjoy the present with and certainly something to use when we begin our fulltime journey.

Geocaching

Waiting is not always easy. You would think Mike and I would be getting better at it but it seems we are indeed getting worse. I know everyone that has ever had their house on the market understands our pain. You keep the house totally clean EVERYDAY! Now I am a good housekeeper, always have been, but this is getting ridiculous. We had not had anybody looking for the past few days so I decided to take some time off. Well, as luck would have it, I got a call today that somebody wanted to see the house this afternoon around 4:00. Note I said around 4:00, that could be anywhere from 3:30 to 5:00 on a bad day. On a good day it means around 4:00. So I got the house in its "show" mode, grabbed our Shih Tzus and headed out for our road trip. They are getting to the point that they know the signs of an upcoming road trip. They are the only ones having any fun with this selling process. The folks came around 4:30 and stayed approximately 15 minutes. Wow, all that work for 15 minutes! One day it will all pay off, at least that is what I keep telling myself!!

With that said, Mike and I decided to look into Geocaching. This is a huge, fun, phenomenon that many fulltimers are involved in as they travel. I went to http://www.geocaching.com/ to see what it was all about. The more I read the more hooked I got. I signed up for a free account and found out that there are many caches hidden in the area around where we currently live and many in Pine Mountain, where we did our hosting last summer. There are not many tools necessary for geocaching but one item that is needed is a hand held GPS. After doing some reading on the subject I discovered that you don't need to purchase the most expensive GPS available for this hobby. We have found the Garmin eTrex Legend might be the one to meet our needs. The GPS should have the following features: basemap, 12 parallel channels to help acquire satellite signals faster , the usual antenna jack, interface jack, memory, power source that can support external power, rocker keypad or touchscreen and most newer GPS devices have functionality specifically created for geocaching. In addition, it was noted that sooner or later you would be glad you purchased a GPS that was waterproof. There are many good GPS devices suited for outdoor use, such as geocaching, but we like the Garmin eTrex Legend and the cost is in the mid range. Once we have purchased the GPS we will begin our first search. We are excited and should be able to purchase the GPS this weekend.

It sure beats cleaning and waiting for that 15 minutes of glory and besides getting outside and smelling the fresh air has to be better than the usual Pine Sol and Scrubbing Bubbles.

Desperate Times Call For Desperate Measures

Ok, generally we are very rational people but after all these months on the market we are getting a little desperate. The other day I found a site on the computer explaining all about St. Joseph and the belief, by many, that he has helped them in the sell of their home. The legend says that St. Joseph is honored as the husband of Mary and the foster father of Jesus. He represents a humble family man who worked as a carpenter and is considered the patron saint of home, family and more recently house-hunting (or in our case, house selling). Popular belief holds that people wishing to enlist St. Joseph's help in selling a house should bury his replica upside-down, facing away from the house about three feet from the "for sale" sign. After the statue is buried you say a sellers meditation and then wait for a buyer for your house. Well it seemed harmless enough so I bought one. Sunday afternoon Mike and I buried our replica of St. Joseph, said our little meditation and now we wait for that perfect family to fall in love with our home.


















Of course, some people are VERY skeptical!!!

We will let you know how it goes - you just never know!!

Essential Advice for Life!!

FOX HUNT

WHEN YOU ARE IN DEEP TROUBLE, LOOK STRAIGHT AHEAD, KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT and SAY NOTHING.

Hot Chocolate

A friend sent this to me the other day and I thought I would share it with my fulltime friends because of all the people I know you understand and know how to enjoy the hot chocolate!


A group of graduates, well established in their careers, were talking at a reunion and decided to go visit their old university professor, now retired. During their visit, the conversation turned to complaints about stress in their work and lives. Offering his guests hot chocolate, the professor went into the kitchen and returned with a large pot of hot chocolate and an assortment of cups - porcelain, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite - telling them to help themselves to the hot chocolate.When they all had a cup of hot chocolate in hand, the professor said:"Notice that all the nice looking, expensive cups are taken, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress. The cup that you're drinking from adds nothing to the quality of the hot chocolate. In most cases it is just more expensive, and in some cases even hides what we drink. What all of you really wanted was hot chocolate, not the cup; but you consciously went for the best cups... And then you began eyeing each other's cups."Now consider this: Life is the hot chocolate; your job, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain life. The cup you have does not define, nor change the quality of the life you have. Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the hot chocolate that God has provided us. God makes the hot chocolate, man chooses the cups. The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything that they have. Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. And enjoy your hot chocolate.


I am so thankful that Mike and I have found a lifestyle that enables us to enjoy our hot chocolate. I hope you enjoy your hot chocolate also!!!

Where Have We Been? And a little Amazing Grace

Well we are still alive and well and still living in our sticks and bricks. You know the old saying about washing the car and it is sure to rain? Well leave it to Mike and I to list our house and the market totally bottoms out. I am sure the realtors of America hate us! LOL. We actually decided to take the house off the market during the winter months and let it "rest" and now we are back at it. This doesn't mean the market is much better it just means we needed some time off and now we are more energized. Don't you just love the selling mode? Everything has to be just perfect so you feel like you can't just relax and live in your house. Oh well, it is part of the process and a step we must take.

Now about the Amazing Grace thing. Our son Stephen graduated from LaGrange College May 17th. Now I know a lot of young people graduated from college this past spring. For us however, this day almost never happened. About three years ago our son made some really terrible decisions concerning his life. Decisions that impacted him as well as us, his parents. I will spare you the details but his life was going in the direction of literal death or figurative death. Neither sounds too great. We almost lost him. Our family experienced the hell of drugs and the impact that they have on all people involved, not just the user. We learned the true meaning of "tough love" and love was the one thing this evil could not destroy. He finally decided he wanted to live and returned to college. Now there is so much more to this story but I will spare you the long version.

So there we sit among all those other parents and friends on the lawn of LaGrange College. That is when we heard the bagpipes playing Amazing Grace. The bagpipes led the processional. They were impressive but not nearly as impressive as that one college student dressed in cap and gown walking to his seat. When his named was called and he walked across that stage to receive his degree I could only think of the journey he had taken to be there. The grace that was sufficient. It was indeed Amazing Grace.

Amazing grace! How sweet the sound, That saved a wretch like me! I once was lost, but now am found - Was blind, but now I see.

Thro' many dangers, toils and snares, I have already come; 'Tis grace has brought me safe thus far, And grace will lead me home.


If anyone reading this ever needs someone to just talk to please know that we are here for you. I only told the very short version of this story there is a much longer version that only someone going through the impact of drugs in a family can understand. We understand your pain and fear. We've been there. Feel free to e-mail us privately and we'll talk or just listen.